Man, how I love the weather in April! Don’t you? Wow!
Oh…wait….okay, right, January.
We had a nice weekend this weekend, filled with new restaurants; we went to the old Biasetti’s restaurant on Irving Park. It’s now called Cordis Brothers supper club and it is awesome and hilarious. I highly recommend it. We had good steaks, and the best people watching (and eavesdropping) in the city.
The rest of the weekend was spent dancing, playing bowling at Holiday Club and yesterday was pretty much a full day of personal work, felt so good to get that done. Now I’m headed into the New Year with a good start, a clean apartment and a handsome Beyonce, not bad.
A few things, do I need to twitter? I don’t know, everyone seems to be twittering but I feel like its just another tie to the computer and such (a computer that, if you’re me, just blew up its hard drive, yes…that’s right, me puter is broken), but I love reading other people’s twitters…I’ll think about it. If you twitter, do you like it?
Yesterday as part of my 2008 plan, I bought some Fage yogurt. I eat yogurt pretty much every morning and I thought this would be a great way to get rid of all this extra sugar and stuff. But blech! The Fage yogurt was gross! Luckily, the brilliant Rachelle says she puts frozen berries from home in hers (thawed out by the time she gets to work) and honey, or Splenda….anyone else eat this devils mixture? I’d love to get used to it, so I’ll try the fruit…but just wanted to see if anyone else has any hints on this?
And one other thing, as it goes after holidays and New Year’s resolutions and all kinds of things, and as I read my Ram Daas meditation book and think about his advice, I am seeing a really common theme in my thinking and that of my friends. Everyone who is going through something right now (a breakup, quitting smoking, death of a loved one) has mentioned to me that they just want to feel better, be done with the pain, and have it all go away. That they are frustrated with themselves for feeling badly, slapping themselves for being so “silly” or “stupid.” Maybe this is a product of getting older, once we start to feel pain we know from experience that it WILL go away, so, since we have this knowledge we want it to go away fast. When you’re young, you think you’ll live with the pain forever, so you don’t think about the time when it’s gone you know?
As someone who is going through this right now in my own way, and watching you all go through it too, the only advice I have is to stop it. Brilliant aren’t I? But really, isn’t all of this about embracing the pain? Feeling it as thoroughly as possible and then letting it go?
I remember a book from forever ago (1993, thanks Wiki!) called “Care of the Soul” by Thomas Moore. The book was about the soul and archetypes and I remember loving it. But the one thing I remember the most is that he used to talk about the dark days of the soul, and how everyone tries to get past it, get around it, get away from it as fast as possible. And how really wrong that was. Because you can’t just get past it, get around it, run away from it, you have to give into it, you have to feel it, and for petes sakes, don’t apologize for it.
The suffering comes from trying to keep it the same. After a break up, death or even giving up smoking, you aren’t going to be the same, there is no “I just want to be back the way I was”. That’s gone. GONE. Lament the passing, feel the shit and then watch it flow down the river.
Okay? Just call me Siddhartha Hixx.