Sunday, November 10, 2013

Self Study

Life is quieter these days. Sweetie is over, Vietnam is over, seasonal tours are pretty much done - although I had great and attended tours this weekend! So great.

And here I think is why I get scared of life slowing down:

I like the hard stuff because then that makes it ok to do the easy stuff later.

I love the cold, so I can get warm.
I love giving tours, so I can go home and sit on the couch.
I love writing Sweetie Maude so I dont' have to write it when I'm finished.

Does that all make sense? I'm very reward-oriented I think and it's so great for me to relax AFTER I've had a really long or hard working day.

SO...if I'm not working all that hard, then I don't get the reward of the relaxation then any relaxation feels like slacking.

I don't know, I think it makes total sense in my head. I'm not sure this is a problem? It's just something I've been thinking about. I just came off of a pretty busy and chilly weekend of tours. Right now I'm warm, with a big cup of tea, I'm about to give myself permission to work Same Same for the next 90 minutes....and I love it.

Three days from now AFTER I've had three days off with no tour, I wonder, will I be able to give myself this space to sit and write and drink tea?

I dunno.

You know?

No comments: