Tuesday, November 05, 2013

It's totally fine, no, yes it is.

Back! Almost 2 weeks. So back that Vietnam is in the past now. I'm okay with that, it's always surprising to me how easy it is to fall back into the patterns. And I don't mean that in a bad way, I like a lot of my patterns, that's why I have them. Work is good and Chicago is good and walks with Remo and creative things and it becomes time to re-inhabit my life again.

And again, and again and again I learn how to slow down some. I have a lot of relaxation time, I do, it's not that, but tours get slower. Life gets slower. I might have two days off in a row and honestly, that is really weird to me. It feels weird. And secretly kind of good and scary. I really do move a lot physically in the summer, constantly almost and it's weird for that to calm down. And then the work and the money, it's weird to let it go, but again, kind of nice too. I have to trust myself that I'll do right with this time and if that means sitting on the couch for a fucking week, well then, shit, I must need that because I know that I don't always want to sit on the couch and won't always want to. So if I really really want to? Maybe I should?

The work is still there and I'm figuring out how to create more of it now too, so it's okay you know?

It's totally okay.


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