Hottest day in Chicago in 7 years.
I'm fine. No worries.
NO I'M NOT. I'M HOT. DOESN'T ANYONE CARE THAT I'M SO HOT?
No they don't, because they're hot too. It's cool.
I had a tour this morning, it was better, but still hot as balls. Great tour though, we had the best time. And I got a gift bag because we've been working on this tour forever. AND, the tour was for choir girls from Bend, OR., so they sang at The Bean and it was awesome.
I just had to film a mini-commercial for Chicago Elevated with puppet pigs. Yes. I did. Hot, but fun. And professional, which is awesome.
I'm hiding out in the McDonalds, using the wi-fi, drinking a massive iced tea.
I have another tour at 4PM. All outside, no hiding anywhere for that one.... but I haven't had a cancellation yet, so we're on!
I keep thinking it's not too bad and then if you stop whatever you're doing, walking, singing, fucking (I don't know!) then you get really hot. So...advice from the tour guide, don't stand still.
Had dinner with the lovely Erica last night and we just jabber jabber, I love it. I don't have to explain myself to her. Makes it so much easier to talk.
And we were talking about how it's okay for me to be happy. Not only just "mourning" mom, but the fear that comes with death. That there is always going to be another shoe waiting to drop. It's easy to stay in that thinking.
But shit. I think I"m happy. I'm pretty sure. I have flashes again, of just...joy. And my brain puts a kaibosh (sp?) on it and now I"m working on letting that just be ok. To be happy again. To not be drowning in my mother's dying, but to come out the other side, knowing one of the hardest things in my life that's ever going to happen has just happened and I'm okay.
Even better than okay.
Except I'm hot.
Really, really hot.
YAY!
I'm fine. No worries.
NO I'M NOT. I'M HOT. DOESN'T ANYONE CARE THAT I'M SO HOT?
No they don't, because they're hot too. It's cool.
I had a tour this morning, it was better, but still hot as balls. Great tour though, we had the best time. And I got a gift bag because we've been working on this tour forever. AND, the tour was for choir girls from Bend, OR., so they sang at The Bean and it was awesome.
I just had to film a mini-commercial for Chicago Elevated with puppet pigs. Yes. I did. Hot, but fun. And professional, which is awesome.
I'm hiding out in the McDonalds, using the wi-fi, drinking a massive iced tea.
I have another tour at 4PM. All outside, no hiding anywhere for that one.... but I haven't had a cancellation yet, so we're on!
I keep thinking it's not too bad and then if you stop whatever you're doing, walking, singing, fucking (I don't know!) then you get really hot. So...advice from the tour guide, don't stand still.
Had dinner with the lovely Erica last night and we just jabber jabber, I love it. I don't have to explain myself to her. Makes it so much easier to talk.
And we were talking about how it's okay for me to be happy. Not only just "mourning" mom, but the fear that comes with death. That there is always going to be another shoe waiting to drop. It's easy to stay in that thinking.
But shit. I think I"m happy. I'm pretty sure. I have flashes again, of just...joy. And my brain puts a kaibosh (sp?) on it and now I"m working on letting that just be ok. To be happy again. To not be drowning in my mother's dying, but to come out the other side, knowing one of the hardest things in my life that's ever going to happen has just happened and I'm okay.
Even better than okay.
Except I'm hot.
Really, really hot.
YAY!
2 comments:
You are great.
xoxo
YOU ARE GREAT.
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