I've been pretty quiet over here.
That's because well, because my stepfather - Al Wehlitz - has passed away.
He died yesterday, on Easter. He might have aimed for that, I'm not sure.
I have/had very conflicting feelings about my stepfather. There have been definite moments, and some not so long ago, where I am sure that I hated Al. The real meaning of the word, not just a dislike, but that I hated him.
There have been times where it's possible I might have loved Al, like when he paid for me to go traveling to southeast asia for 3 months.
But the fact is, he and mom weren't that great and once she had her stroke, in every way but financially, he split. He's been in Maine this whole time and we don't really speak.
But of course, I grew up in this man's house, he changed everything in our family, still has the power to do so.
We don't know where mom is left financially, there are some worries she's not as set up as she should be, although Al has lots of money.
So, it's very bittersweet, we spoke, he sounded tiny. I told him I loved him and safe journeys.
I feel weird about it, better now that he's actually gone...but yeah man, death is some weird stuff.
I'm so philosophical and wise.
Geesh.
That's because well, because my stepfather - Al Wehlitz - has passed away.
He died yesterday, on Easter. He might have aimed for that, I'm not sure.
I have/had very conflicting feelings about my stepfather. There have been definite moments, and some not so long ago, where I am sure that I hated Al. The real meaning of the word, not just a dislike, but that I hated him.
There have been times where it's possible I might have loved Al, like when he paid for me to go traveling to southeast asia for 3 months.
But the fact is, he and mom weren't that great and once she had her stroke, in every way but financially, he split. He's been in Maine this whole time and we don't really speak.
But of course, I grew up in this man's house, he changed everything in our family, still has the power to do so.
We don't know where mom is left financially, there are some worries she's not as set up as she should be, although Al has lots of money.
So, it's very bittersweet, we spoke, he sounded tiny. I told him I loved him and safe journeys.
I feel weird about it, better now that he's actually gone...but yeah man, death is some weird stuff.
I'm so philosophical and wise.
Geesh.
6 comments:
Hey Margaret,
I'm so sorry... I think loss is much harder to deal with when you're conflicted, because it takes so much more time and energy to come to any sort of resolution. I went through that with my grandfather, and I had lots of anger to deal with as well as the happy memories. It was a rough mix to deal with, and even though it was over 20 years ago, his death still brings up uncomfortable feelings for me.
Please let me know if there's anything else I can do.
Mark
I'm sorry about your loss, even though you're not really totally sure how you feel! Looking forward to seeing you tomorrow.
Thinking of you, sweet friend.
I'm sorry honey. Sending you lots of love.
Thinking of you, Hixx. <3
I just read this and I know that we're meeting tonight but I wanted to extend my deepest sympathy to you (and your brothers and mom) in regards to Al. I met him during Coyote Pretty (seems like ages ago). Love you, Joxx!
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