What happens, stays

Yeep!

Okay, first off, make sure to check out my 3.2 MILE RUN yesterday! Booya! Holla! It felt really good, it sure did. Still slow as molasses but I seriously don’t give a damn, a 5K has been my goal for a long time and I know for sure now I can do it. I can work on speed as I go, but damnation, seriously, the fact that I did it is astounding. YAY!

And, I’ve finally made my other goal, get to Tuesday afternoon, just get to Tuesday afternoon, and here I am, in 24 hours I’ll be sittin’ at some slots, drinking a vodka and seven and fighting little old ladies for slot machines.

A friend of mine, Erin, just got back from Vegas and lets just say…did not fall in love with the place. And man oh man, I can absolutely see why. I’m on the verge of hating Vegas too, that’s why I love it right? One thing she said struck me as interesting and I had to ponder on it for a bit.

She told me that the place is so manufactured to bring in money, that there is no “true beauty” there. And I instantly agreed. There isn’t (I did tell her though that Dale Chihuly’s ceiling at The Bellagio is truly beautiful), there is no true beauty there. And maybe, just maybe, that’s what I like about it. It is one place where you don’t need to look for, and will never find, true beauty. In some ways, you can give your creative, beauty-seeking mind a rest. You can sit back and look at the junk architecture and be amazed that it’s even up there, without considering its beauty or its impact. You can have drinks and cigarettes and spend money and eat, all without reproach. It is the opposite of beauty, the opposite of what we seek; it is the chance to enjoy your darker side, your piggy side, your hungry side. It is your chance to see the underbelly in all its vicious incarnations, it is the chance to let go of class, of race, of age, and join the harmonious but harrowing throngs of the human race….all while drinking free drinks at a slot.

It is a chance at freedom from all of your self-discipline.

And of course, the most amazing thing of all, you get to come home. You get to come back, wish for beauty and discipline, feel relief that your life is as you left it and you can be responsible, and in shape and financially sound. For me, realizing just how hard the “Vegas” lifestyle is, is reason enough to go. It gives me impetus to come home and do all the right things and be the person I want to be, and remember with certain evil glee the place where I can have vodka sevens at nine in the morning (I never have), gamble all my money away on blackjack (never even played at a table in my life) and rent hookers anytime of the day (I’ve done this A TON).

I don’t know, I am constantly trying to discover why Vegas holds a place in my heart, and I really believe that it speaks to my “dark side” and sometimes, you just got to let that girl out.

No more blogging till next week. Don’t miss me too much kay? If I win big, I’ll buy you all a car!