On "The Hills"

I’ve decided that The Hills is one of my most favorite, coveted shows.

Laugh all you want superior beings, but you will be laughing away, missing one of the greatest shows on television, especially if you’re female and haven’t quite let go of your youth.

I know there is no “reality” in The Hills, and even can appreciate the new brand of scripted reality television. Laguna Beach started us out with this fabulous type of TV, and I love me some Laguna Beach as well, but The Hills is just a cut above the rest. Maybe it’s because we still get to follow Lauren and her crew, we’re not introduced to a new bunch of Hills girls that we have to get to know again.

What really attracts me to The Hills is the fantasy. This is what every single 11 year old girl wanted, and still wants, to be rich, beautiful and out of their parents house. The girls on the Hills have all the problems we wished we had when we would lie on our beds of our parents house, imagining the men we were going to be with and the friends we had. We would see ourselves living with our best girlfriend in a beautiful condo overlooking the ocean, defending the horrible men we fell in love with while getting our hair and nails done.

We would imagine ourselves in beautiful cars, going to the best clubs, wearing the best clothes and drinking Starbucks. The Hills have all of this, how am I not supposed to be attracted to this sort of post-fantasy fulfillment?

The women who are cast are perfect; Lauren-the quiet victim, Heidi-the outrageous nutcase, Audrina-the fair-weather friend and my personal favorite, Whitney-the sounding board. Whitney is my favorite because she’s so pretty I think. And she asks the right questions, and she’s totally Lauren-centric. And what she does is ask Lauren questions, the right questions about her friendships or her loves, but then she wanders away, leaving Lauren to answer. She also never goes “out” with the girls. Where is Whitney on Friday nights? I’ve decided she has a sick mother she has to attend to, she’s either always at school or work. She’s never out getting drunk and stupid.

And to cap it off, the men these women date are so horrible, so awful, so demeaning, so stupid and so ridiculous that they are exactly every single 20-23 year old man I met in college. The casting directors of The Hills do the best job in picking really disgusting men we love to hate.

The Hills represents every fantasy I had as an awkward girl, they are each and every one of them who I wanted to be, for better or for worse, and it’s my favorite indulgence.

So say we all.