Back in Jack

It’s nice to have you back Mr. Bauer, we’ve missed you. America has missed you, and thank you for giving us something to look forward to for the next few months. I’m sorry about your scarred hands and welty back, but you look good. Real good. Even in that buttoned-all-the-way-to-the-top shirt you had on.

So yeah, two hours last night, two tonight and the Hixx is salivating. I thought the first two episodes were pretty good. It’s always nice to hear Jack Bauer say “Bill, it’s Jack, I don’t have a lot of time…” BOOM! I like the new CTU hottie dude, and am a little leery of sister Palmer just showing up, but I have faith in 24, and know that all the secret understories have not even begun to unravel, so I’m cool with it.

John mentioned at one point that he needed some spice, that even though it was the first episode, he wished something would happen. Then all of a sudden Jack is Hannibaling his teeth into a terrorist, so yeah, there’s your spice.

And you know what? Speaking of Hannibal, I have already told you all how much I hated “Hannibal Rising”. It was a really stupid book where nothing happened, even though there is so much room for fun in feeling out Hannibal’s childhood, shit, I could have written it better. It was not scary, not interesting, not creative, not anything.

But yet, the movie is coming out in February. This book was JUST released, and now there’s a movie? COME ON. That is total BS. Harris wrote this just to be turned into a movie, which in some cases, is okay. Grisham did it, but he wrote interesting books. Crichton’s done it, but I couldn’t wait for the movie to come out. But this? This piece of poo writing?

And I wouldn’t be so mad if I didn’t think Harris could write, obviously he can at least entertain us and just chose not to with Hannibal Rising. I think he’s a sellout, and a cheat and kind of a butthead.

And there’s no way I’m giving any money to him anymore. No books, no movies. I’ll just let John keep doing his Clarice Starling imitation and get my fill that way. Trust me, it’s a lot more interesting than that stupid book.